Matzah: The OG Flatbread That’s Low-Key Iconic (Even If It’s Dry AF)

Okay bestie, let’s talk about matzah. You know, that thin, crunchy, unleavened bread that shows up every Passover like an uninvited guest who somehow still slays. It’s giving history, it’s giving tradition, it’s giving “we escaped Egypt, now here’s a cracker.” But don’t sleep on it — matzah is literally the blueprint. Is it dry? Absolutely. Is it boring? Only if you let it be. Today we’re giving matzah the chaotic Gen Z breakdown it deserves.

First Things First: What Even Is Matzah?

Let’s get educational real quick (but like, fun). Matzah is a super basic flatbread made with just two ingredients: flour and water. That’s it. No yeast, no rising, no vibes — because it’s supposed to symbolize the rush the Israelites were in when they fled Egypt. No time for bread to rise, babes — Pharaoh was being toxic and they had to go. So matzah is the edible receipt of that moment.

In Jewish tradition, we eat matzah during Passover to honor that wild escape story. It’s unleavened, unbothered, and honestly kinda iconic in its simplicity. It’s the Taylor Swift of breads — polarizing, but with an intense cult following.

The Basic Recipe (aka Matzah, But Make It From Scratch)

Now, if you’re feeling ✨ambitious✨ and want to make matzah from scratch (yes, you can), here’s how to do it in the most unproblematic way possible.

Ingredients:

• 1 cup all-purpose flour (OG, no fancy gluten-free drama unless you need it)
• 1/3 cup water
• A pinch of salt (optional, but we love flavor)
• That’s literally it.

Directions:

IMPORTANT: According to tradition, you’ve got 18 minutes from the moment the flour and water touch to the moment it hits the oven. Anything past that and it’s no longer Passover-approved. So this is a race against the clock, not a lazy Sunday bake. Channel your inner Great British Baking Show contestant, but like, make it biblical.

1. Preheat your oven to 475°F (hot girl summer but for matzah).
2. Mix the flour and water in a bowl fast AF. You’re not kneading a sourdough here, just combine until it’s dough-like.
3. Roll it out thin — like thinner than your tolerance for drama.
4. Use a fork to poke little holes all over (aka “docking”). This keeps it from puffing up. No leavening allowed, remember?
5. Bake on a pizza stone or baking sheet for 2-3 minutes each side. You want it crispy, not charred.
6. Take it out, let it cool, snap a pic (because obviously), and flex that you made matzah from scratch.

Matzah: The Many Moods

Okay, plain matzah is cool for the symbolism or whatever, but let’s be real — you’re gonna get bored fast. The key to surviving eight days of matzah life? Customization, baby.

Here’s the matzah remix menu:

• Matzah Pizza – Add sauce, cheese, and your fave toppings. Broil it and thank me later.
• Matzah Brei – Basically French toast meets scrambled eggs. Total Passover comfort food.
• Chocolate-Covered Matzah – Melt chocolate, drizzle, sprinkle with sea salt. A crunchy little snack that slaps.
• Matzah Nachos – Break it up, layer with cheese and beans, pop in the oven. Suddenly, you’re a matzah innovator.
• Matzah Sandwich (aka Matzahwich) – Stack your deli faves between two sheets and pretend it’s a gourmet lunch.

Is Matzah Dry? Yeah. But So Is My Humor.

Look, matzah isn’t here to win Bake Off. It’s here to tell a story. Every bite is a throwback to survival, resilience, and doing what you gotta do even when you’ve got nothing but flour, water, and vibes. It’s the ultimate “main character in a crisis” food.

So whether you’re observing Passover or just vibing with ancient carbs, matzah is kinda the moment. It’s crunchy, it’s historic, it’s minimalism-core. And tbh? That’s pretty Gen Z.

Final Thoughts:

Eat it plain, zhuzh it up, smash some avo on top — whatever you do, just respect the crisp. Matzah walked (very fast out of Egypt) so that all these modern flatbreads could run. Period.